Turning Bad News Into Great News

by Life Outside The Maze

There was a taxidermy shop on main street. A woman stood in darkness. Next to her was a deer and a guitar under melting roses. She looked down from a surreal mural as we passed through Eden. A home made sign on a white gated driveway incongruously read pro America, pro gun, pro god, pro Trump. I’m driving while listening to Ronan Farrow’s “Catch and Kill” on audible. I wonder to myself how an East coast elitist billionaire somehow Weinsteined all of rural conservative America and then took up residence for 4 years like an abusive boyfriend. Some of the towns we pass through have a church that is simply called “The Church.”

The Bad News 

Only 4 days prior we were sitting at home on some bad news. My sister and half of her family had tested positive for Covid19 (thankfully they are now improving). My oldest son’s school had also shut down for 2 days to sanitize after several cases in the other cohort. He would be remote through the end of the year. When it started to look like my youngest was also going to go remote it occurred to me that we may all be holed up back at home for awhile. Wow I am low on ideas of how to keep everyone sane, I lamented. I wondered what the next couple of months would look like. What we all really need after a year like this one is a vacation.

The Great News

A lightbulb appeared over my head. Since everyone is working remote, we will soon be location independent! If we have to be holed up somewhere it could be anywhere! We could use our cash to actually create options for ourselves in this case. If we drove rather than flew and stayed in an AirBNB rather than a hotel, we could greatly minimize our possibility of getting Covid. I found a house for $150 per night with a pool.

By using timing as a currency, we could save about 50% on this place versus the high season. It is only a block away from over 60 miles of sugary sand beaches. I checked the weather and saw a forecast of 70s and 80s. My lady and I booked it quickly! Where is this amazing place you ask? We set off on the 19 and a half hour drive to Texas y’all!

Tumbleweeds and Cowboy Hats

Thwap, thump, ka-chunk!  The tumble weeds slapped off the grill of our car.  It was a steady stream of them.  They seemed to get bigger as we crossed Texline into the panhandle.  Maybe there actually is something to that thing about everything being bigger in Texas.  “I want to go home with the armadillo, good country music from Amarillo and Abilene…” sings Jerry Jeff Walker from a thousand years ago on the stereo.  I thought it would be fitting since we would be driving through both towns and since Walker had just died a couple of weeks ago.  I chuckle and ask the kids to give a thumb scale on the tune.  They pause Mario Cart in the backseat long enough to give the song two enthusiastic thumbs down.

Over 900 miles of our drive time will just be crossing the state of Texas tip to tail.  I have been to San Antonio and Houston by plane but have scarcely driven any of this giant state until now.  In Colorado we make fun of Texans for skiing in jeans.  With BBQ, Y’alls, and howdys, it’s easy to make Texas a caricature in a ten gallon hat.  Though I should say that the first guy I saw when we crossed into Texas was indeed wearing boots and a cowboy hat.  

Texas On The Road

The state is huge and epic. There were long slow open stretches punctuated by occasional towns with names that seemed written by Cormac McCarthy. Bushland, Canyon, Lubbock, Slaton, Justiceburg, Roscoe, Menard. When we went through Channing, I was sure that Tatum would be just around the bend. We drove through fields of cotton some still to be harvested and other huge bails wrapped in bright yellow plastic.

So That’s What Cotton Looks Like Before it becomes a t-shirt.

When we stopped at a sanitized hotel for the night in Sweetwater, I asked the woman if all of those trucks out front belonged to oil workers and she told me “nope, windmills.” They were going up all over the place. Texas leads the nation in wind power with almost triple the windmills of the next closest state (Iowa).

Are We Really On The Beach Right Now?

The temp climbed and more cacti started appearing as we plunged into South Texas past San Antonio and then finally across a two mile bridge to South Padre Island, the longest barrier island in the world. This is probably a place that we would never have come to except for the unique conditions brought by Covid. We made it to the place and then quickly to the beach just before sunset 2 days after starting out.

A Sand Castle in The Tide, South Padre.

It feels weird to be here when 4 days ago I would not have envisioned it. The boys were huge smiles jumping in the surf even if they had to wear masks when other people occasionally came by. We are going to set up remote school and remote work for Mrs Maze. I will be setting up provisions and generally exploring the backwaters. Word came through that school has switched to remote through the end of the year so we may just extend or add another destination along the road. I anticipate a spike in Covid with thanksgiving and time will tell what the future holds. However, if we are holed away somewhere, this is not a bad choice and I am happy to see what unfolds.

Feel free to ask me a question, lambast me for comparing Trump To Harvey Weinstein, or share your own tale of making the most out of these times in the comments below.

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4 comments

Dominic November 18, 2020 - 10:50 am

My wife and I lost both of our jobs back in April. It was pretty dark for a few weeks. Fortunately our savings was enough to get us through a few months. Over the past three years we were living in Baltimore and didn’t really like it. We had moved there because I was suddenly laid off from my job in Tucson and we had vowed to return. With time on my hands and nowhere to go, I applied to a place in Phoenix. By the middle of May we were on our way back to Arizona. Phoenix is bigger, hotter, and less eclectic than Tucson, but it’s still close enough. We both have higher paying jobs with a lower cost of living. Since I work at a biotech company I get access to weekly Covid tests, and L can work from home. 2020 has been quite a year for us. We passed through some of the same parts of Texas you described, lots of windmills, tumbleweeds, and at least 1 giant cross. Now that Phoenix is not terribly hot, we are going on local hiking adventures every weekend.

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Life Outside The Maze November 18, 2020 - 2:24 pm

Sounds like a rough few months Dominic and inspiring that you kept going and turned it into something great! I hear you on those giant crosses. I saw at least 3. Thanks for sharing your bad news, great news tale 🙂

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Deana November 19, 2020 - 2:39 pm

Mr. Life Outside the Maze,
You know I love your posts as I have written to thank you a few times. Thank you for continuing to write. I was a bit disappointed to see politics creep in as there are very few places left that are free from them and it is a very polarizing topic unfortunately. That said, welcome to the great red state of Texas. I hope you and your family enjoy all that it has to offer.

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Life Outside The Maze November 19, 2020 - 3:56 pm

Thanks for commenting Deana. I agree with you that this is the most divided that the country has ever been in my lifetime. As a political independent, I believe that we always deserve capable leaders that unite and serve all of us. I myself grew up in rural middle America and behind my (non-politically correct) joke at the top of this post is an earnest observation that genuinely surprises me. That an east coast billionaire with the history, values, and demeanor of Trump has somehow been embraced by much of rural conservative America. I think less a political statement than actual surprise at this seeming odd couple. I don’t know if this helps but feel free to add a reply if you like. Also wait ‘til you see the amazing redfish I caught down here. I am loving Texas!

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